I am probably the most awkward person I know.
I use to be embarrassed by some of my past experiences but hey it’s all about what you learn from it right? Now I know I am very harsh on myself that is something I’ve been trying to get better at but we all have those stories that we’re embarrassed by when it comes to having a crush on someone. While battling the stomach flu (yes, the flu you finally got to me -_-) and being taken care of by my husband it made me realize how truly thankful I am for what all those past experiences led to. Just seeing my spikey haired love bringing me Gatorade to stay hydrated, buying me food, and walking my dogs while he tries to let me get rest. Those are the little things I appreciate.
Growing up I was ALWAYS the single one out of my friends. Now it’s not like I never dated it’s that I never had very serious relationships. I was always so picky and so painfully shy to the point where I would get so awkward when guys would try to talk to me. Even one of my best friends asked if I was a lesbian one day since I was I single for a long time. I will leave you nameless but you know who you are. That really got to me although I never said anything at the time. I felt like growing up people would treat you so different based on how many people you’ve hooked up with, how old you were when you did so and so, sharing stories about their experiences and so forth. I always hated sharing stories because I was always pretty private about everything, not to mention had some awkward encounters. Well since I am happy in love and happy all around why not share three stories with you all…scroll down for them 🙂
High School Freshmen Year: I had a crush on a guy in my biology class. I use to get so excited when sixth period would come around because I got to end the day with him in my class. It sounds creepy but ladies I’m sure you know the feeling. I had a few conversations with him but nothing big, mainly over some of the same music we liked. I would get excited and tell my friends. Well my friends took it into their own hands and hand wrote a letter about how I liked him and gave it to him. I was beyond mortified since they didn’t tell me about their plan. Let’s just say after that letter was given, no feelings were reciprocated and I tried avoiding talking to him out of embarrassment and not wanting to get hurt.
College: Freshmen year of college, I developed a crush on one of my friends in class. This guy and I were each other’s partners in class for groups and basically study partners for that class. After going through a break up I realized how much of a catch this guy actually was and became attracted to him. We were very different though at the time, he was a straight edge christian (I wasn’t deep in my faith at the time) and I was a party animal. I used to party so much and kept thinking about why couldn’t it work out yet didn’t have the balls to text him and thought he probably doesn’t party. Anyways I would drunk text him and needless to say it was embarrassing. Ladies and Gentlemen, please do not drink and text it is NEVER a good idea. He was nice enough to always text me back and talk with me but let’s just say class was awkward and he actually got a girlfriend not long after.
The I didn’t know it was a girl’s night: When Jared and I first started dating I was excited to hang out with him as much as I could. I think it’s pretty normal to feel like this when you first start dating someone and have a really good connection with. Jared had this thing when we first started dating where we would switch off picking the dates. When it was my turn to pick a date/hangout, a few of my coworkers wanted to go out on the weekend. Now they always had boyfriends so I assumed it was a co-ed thing when I invited him. The morning of the hangout and exchanging texts I found out it was a girl’s thing, I asked my friends if it was okay and I could tell it seemed off but still brought him anyways. The night was fun but I could tell it was definitely more of a girl’s night setting not to mention we were being a bit too affectionate. Whoops!
Looking back, this is all I feel comfortable sharing and it is pretty interesting reflecting on all those moments you never thought you would grow from. I’m sure people have gone through worst but hey they say we are, our own worst critics. So whatever Valentine’s Day may bring, whether you are single, taken or married I hope you guys all have a good one! Also if it turns out awkward you’re not alone. Call one of your friend’s up, have a night out and laugh about it later!
Til next time! <3
